5 Positive Steps to Build Confidence and Destroy Fear

King Solomon, considered by many to be the wisest man ever, stated, “As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he.” (Proverbs 23:7).   There are many other quotes and sayings that suggest the same message, “What one thinks about, He or she becomes!”  A few months ago, I had the pleasure of reading the book, The Magic of Thinking Big by Dr. David Schwartz (1987). Dr. Schwartz goes on to explain different techniques to program your mind for success.  A major part of reaching success is having confidence and overcoming fear.  This isn’t always a simple task, so Dr. Schwartz provided some helpful and positive steps that one can take to increase confidence and overcome fear.  Below I explain the 5 tips that he provided, which I hope you find to be as helpful as I did. 

1.     Be a Front Seater

While I was in high School and college, I always thought it was always cool to sit toward the back of the classroom.  There have been studies that show that those students who sit near or in the front of the class are likely to do much better on the test, and in turn establish more confidence.  The same concept can be applied post college; whether in meetings at your job, going to a seminar or conference, or even going to a sporting event.  The closer you are to the front, the more confidence you are likely to have, and at the same time fear starts to remove itself from the picture.

Related Video: Ted Talk on the Skill of Confidence

2.     Practice making eye contact

This is a great way to start building confidence. However, you just want to make sure not to be extreme to the point where it’s creepy.   An important lesson that I learned in reading a biography about Nelson Mandela, is that he always used great eye contact. He always held his head and shoulders high instead of slouching over or looking down.  When you walk tall and look people directly in their eyes, it gives you confidence and also lets the other person know that you are self-assured.  This definitely applies for when you encounter someone who is considered important because you don’t want to come off as shy or timid. Practice making eye contact and standing tall, and you will almost immediately feel more poised.

3.     Walk 25 percent faster

For all my people on the East Coast, you probably do this automatically.  However, those of us from the South or Midwest should probably start using this rule.  When you start to walk a little faster, from an outside perspective, it seems as if you have somewhere important to be.  On the inside you feel a little more assertive, and it makes you want to have somewhere important to be.  Science and history shows that once your mind believes something, it begins to figure out to how to make it a reality.  So, walk a little faster and start feeling more confident.

Related: More Ways to Overcome Fear

4.     Practice Speaking Up

There are plenty of opportunities where you should start practicing the act of speaking up.  For many people this may come natural, and for others it is something that takes repetition.  If you work at a job, you can begin to speak up in team meetings, in one on one sessions with your supervisor, or reaching out others in different departments to learn new things.  In social settings, begin making it a point to start a conversation with a stranger and find out something about the person.  Another great opportunity to speak up is at a seminar or conference where the speaker offers the chance to ask questions.  Each of these examples will help you begin to build confidence and start to overcome fear.

5.     Smile Big!!!

This is my personal favorite because it is one of the easiest things to do and it always gives you a pleasant feeling inside, especially when it is genuine.  The best communicators, leaders, and influencers have mastered the art of smiling.  In the biography that I read about Nelson Mandela, it said that it was his smile that won him the election in South Africa.  Smiling not only gives you self-assurance, but it also extremely contagious. Smiling puts the person that you’re speaking to at ease.

Start to implement these five steps and you will begin to build more confidence, overcome fear, and stare success directly in the eyes!!

 Related: More Benefits of Smiling

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The Importance of the Follow Up

In business, especially when building meaningful relationships, the act of following up is extremely important, yet often it is overlooked.  Unfortunately, in our day and age, following up with new acquaintances is becoming a lost art.  Being an entrepreneur and pursing the dream of becoming a Power Connector, I have placed an emphasis on “the act of following up”.  In studying other successful individuals, reading, and through experience, I have learned a few things in regards to the importance of the following up.

1. Lets others know you are serious

Have you ever been to a networking event or a conference and when you came home, you had a pocket full of business cards?  There have been instances I have met someone, exchanged information, with the hopes of connecting sometime in the near future, only to never speak to the person again.  In reading about power connecters and successful business men and women, I have learned that they take following up with others very seriously.  They understand that when you follow up instantly with people that you meet, it lets the other party know that you are serious about connecting. Given that many people don’t follow up at all, you can easily set yourself apart and let others know that you are serious just with a simple email, phone call, text message, or Facebook and LinkedIn request.

Related: 4 Ways to Follow Up after an Interview

2. Important step in building successful relationships

I have always been a firm believer that people are your greatest resource.  Judy Robinett, author and Power Connector may have said it best, “In business, as in life, relationships are the the real power grid that smart people use to get things done faster and more effectively”.  In building strategic relationships, it will be imperative that you learn to follow up on a consistent basis.  Many successful individuals, as well as businesses have a system for how and when they follow up with others.  It could be said that “following up” is the actual first step in creating a positive and meaningful relationship.

3. The Sooner the Better

Making it a point to follow up with people that you meet, will not only let them know that you are serious, but it will also keep you fresh on their minds.  Most successful individuals will attempt to follow up within 24-48 hours of meeting and many will follow up the same day or the very next morning.  Some people, such as power connectors, influencers, or leaders may be extremely busy and sometime it may be difficult for them to follow up immediately, however the sooner you can follow up the better.

Related: The Benefits of Being an Effective Communicator 

4. Takes 5-7 Contacts to turn prospect to client.

My first job out of college was as a Financial Advisor with Edward Jones Investment Company.  As a beginning advisor in order to build to my business, we required to make at least 25 contacts per day.  These contacts could consist of going door to door in local neighborhoods, phone calls, in person appointments or some combination of all three.  As you can probably imagine, going door to door was my least favorite approach.  One thing that they taught us, that I still remember, was that it takes between 5-7 contacts with a prospect before they became a client.  That means that in order to turn a prospect into a client, it is mandatory that you follow up not once, but multiple times.  If you want to build successful relationships, then following up is mandatory.

5. You never know who you can help or visa versa

I stated earlier about going to different networking events or conferences and leaving with a pocket full of business cards.  Many times these business cards end up getting thrown away or end up in a big box or rolodex, full of other people that you never spoke with again.  On the road to success, help or an unexpected big break often comes from the place that least expect it.  If you never follow up with the people that you encounter, you will never know who can help you, or the people that you could help as well.  You may need an Investor for your business, and one of the person’s that you met may have direct access to multiple investors but you would never know because you failed to follow up.   You want to build some bridges and connections in your life, then start the act of following up!

Why Social Skills Are Important and How to Improve Them

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10 Things You Can Do to Ensure a Great Day

Perhaps you have heard of the saying, “woke up on the wrong side of the bed” and if you’re normal, you’ve probably experienced waking up not in the best of moods.  Although every day will be not be pure awesomeness, there are certain things that one can do to increase the chances of having great days more often than not.  I’ve put together a list of 10 things that you can do to ensure a great day, and broken them up into two parts.  This is the first half of the list. 

1. START YOUR DAY WITH A GRATEFUL HEART

I personally believe that you should begin each and every day with a grateful heart.  If you were given another opportunity to wake up and experience another day above ground, regardless of your circumstances, then you have a good reason to be thankful.  Expressing gratitude as soon as you start your day will set the tone for the remainder of your day, and put a spotlight on something thats positive.  

2. LITERALLY YELL THE WORDS, “TODAY WILL BE A GREAT DAY!!”

There is power in the tongue; and the words that we hear and say can have a large impact on how we view the outside world.  Why do you think some motivational speakers get paid thousands of dollars to speak??  Perhaps you have heard someone say “speak things into existence”, well this is definitely a true statement! If you want to experience a wonderful day, why not yell the words, “Today will be a great Day”!

RELATED: 7 WAYS TO MAKE THIS WEEK GREAT!

3. TAKE A COLD SHOWER

Maybe you have heard of this technique before, and if not, I would highly recommend giving it a try.  This will definitely be uncomfortable, but the benefits are well worth it.  Taking a cold shower has been proving to: relieve stress, stimulate weight loss, increase alertness, speed up muscle soreness and recovery, and give you more energy!  Want to start your day off on the right foot, try taking a cold shower!

4. EAT CLEAN

Many experts have said that breakfast is the most important meal of the day.  There is also no secret that the foods that we put into our body determine a great deal of how we feel mentally and physically.  Eating healthy in the morning time will give us more energy and also help us move into a more positive state.

5.     SMILE

It is extremely difficult and perhaps impossible to have negative thoughts and feelings when you smile, especially if it is genuine.  When you smile, you almost immediately feel good and you tend to think about things that make you happy.  Smiling not only has a positive impact on yourself, but it can also brighten up someone else’s day.  Smiling is contagious, so why not start the morning with a big happy smile!

6. EXERCISE

For anyone who does their exercise routine in the morning, they will quickly tell you that this is one of the best ways to start your day.  I’ve read about several successful individuals and a large majority of them start they day with a morning jog or lifting some weights.  Starting your day by exercising with put you in a positive mind state and also make you feel more confident.

7. SPEND TIME OUTSIDE

They have been studies that show that people who spend at least 30 minutes outside tend to be happier than those who don’t.  Start your day by jogging for 30-45 minutes outside and you can kill two birds with one stone; exercising and time spent outdoors.  Try taking a moment in the middle of your day or even a night to take a brief walk outside, and you will be surprised at the positive impact it will have.  A side note, if you want to burn some extra calories, try taking that walk after you eat lunch or dinner.  Your body will appreciate it. 

RELATED: 11 REASONS TO SPEND TIME OUTSIDE THE OFFICE

8. LISTEN OR WATCH SOMETHING MOTIVATIONAL

This a great way to get your day started off in the right direction.  I personally like to do this at the start and end of my days.  Hearing a positive message in the morning will subsequently put you in a positive mind state.  When you hear a motivational message, it encourages you to be productive, make the most of your day, and allows your energy to move in the right direction.

RELATED: MOTIVATIONAL VIDEO!! 

9. LEND A HELPING HAND

If you want to have a great day, do something nice for someone and not expect anything in return.  One day on my way to work (when I worked a regular job) I stopped to get a couple of donuts, and the gentlemen in front of me was with his young daughter and had forgotten his wallet at home.  I bought the guy and and his daughter’s breakfast and they both smiled and thanked me.  This must have been a couple of years ago and I can still remember till this day how I felt afterward, and went on to have an amazing and blessed day.

10. LISTEN TO YOUR FAVORITE MUSIC AND DO A DANCE!

One last way to have a great day, is simply to listen to your favorite music and dance!  I don’t believe I ever saw someone who was dancing, and they weren’t happy and having a good time, regardless if they could dance or not.  Music is good for the soul, and dancing is good for the body, not to mention its Universal! This is something that has been done for ages, all across the world in different cultures.  You want to have a great day, sing and a do a dance!

If you are looking for quality content in regards to Financial Education, Personal Growth, Development and Entrepreneurship you can contact us at The Alston Collab. We also help provide content and tips for Personal finance for millennials

Accounting 101: The Balance Sheet

Financial Literacy can be defined as the ability to make judgements based on good information.  It is also the ability to understand how money works in the world; how someone earns or makes money, how that person manages it, how he/she invest it (turn it into more) and how that person donates it to help others.  Before you begin to accumulate wealth, it is extremely important that you try to fully understand money and how it operates. Learning the basic accounting principles would be a great start.  In college, I was required to take 12 hours of accounting and I was not fond of the subject, but now I certainly understand the importance of the subject.  In this blog will take a look at the Balance Sheet, which is one the very first things you learn about in the exciting topic of accounting. 

Related: The Importance of Accounting

Assets

Assets are things that have a lasting value.  An asset can include: a home (real estate), investments (stocks, bonds, mutual funds, cd’s, pension/retirement plans), a business, jewelry, professional paintings, antique cars, and of course cash money.

All of the assets listed above, are things that are tangible or something that you can touch and feel.  An Asset can also be something that you possess that could potentially earn income for you or put money inside your pocket.  That type of asset can include, education & knowledge, or a particular skill, such as: comedian, hair stylist or barber, tax preparer, chef, surgeon, athlete, or an artist.  All of these individuals have potential to earn money off of their skill and/or talent, and some will earn more than others based on how well they perform their skill.

The more ASSETS you have, the better! In Robert Kiyoski’s “Rich Dad, Poor Dad”, he said you can be considerded Financially Independent, when your total assets combined are able to continue to pay for your monthly living expenses on an ongoing basis.  Wealthy individuals are able to do this consistently while continuing to increase their asset column and minimize their expenses (liabilities) column.

Related: The 7 Rules to Acquiring Money

Liabilities

Liabilities is something in which an individual is responsible for, especially a DEBT or a Financial Obligation.  Good examples of liabilities would include: car notes, credit card debt, student loans, mortgage loans (if you are the borrower), payday advance loans, health care bills, business loans, or any other outstanding debt.  Whether you’re an individual or a business, you typically would like to decrease your liabilities and increase the amount of your assets. 

Liabilities in most cases take money out of your pocket, while assets put money back into your pocket.  If you are a business owner or an investor, there are certain situations where a liability could essentially put money into your pocket.  A perfect example, would be an investor taking a mortgage out for a second home.  However, since the investor is knowledgeable, he knows that he will get a great interest rate on his loan and that due the size of the house and neighborhood, he could easily rent the home out to a small family.  Based on the market value of the home, the rent would end up more than the investor’s monthly mortgage payment, meaning that every month the home would pay the investor income, although the home shows as a liability on his books. 

Related: The Cash Flow Quadrant

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